Conversations with God

At every TNT information night they tell you how great training for an endurance event can be. You will get in shape, do something few people in the world accomplish and you will make lasting friendships. Oh.... and raise funds to cure cancer.
Those of us who sign up, do so eagerly. All for different reasons, but the underlying cause is fundraising. We all recognize why we are together. Many of us have been touched by cancer, either personally or having a close relationship with someone who has dealt with this horrible disease.

My reason was to get in shape. I had trained with TNT before in two different sports and felt that this could  inspire me to get off the couch. Every day that I train or convince myself that I should, I realize that its bigger than me. I often think about what kind of role model I am for my daughters. Will I be strong enough? Will I make them proud?
I think about the people who are battling this horrible disease and those that have lost that battle. In the 12 weeks that I have trained for this event, 8 people that I know of, have been diagnosed with some type of cancer. That is unfathomable.
What I didn't anticipate, was what I would do or think about while I was in the pool for an hour or two. Where would my mind go as I rode for 30 miles? I struggled for a long time in keeping focused.
That's when I started talking to God.
I know, doesn't sound much like me, but its true! I wouldn't call it praying, I am not asking for things.... Well not most of the time.  I found that my conversations were about gratitude and peace. I started to crave my time in the pool because that's when quiet enveloped me and I could share my thoughts.
I was and am grateful for the gifts in my life. My family and friends mean so very much to me. I am truly blessed.
In two weeks, I will complete my first triathlon. I am determined that it will not be my last. Through the last few months I have gained far more than one could imagine. A smaller dress size is what I wanted, a new perspective on life is what I got.